There are a lot of people to help with things around the house. Nevertheless, there is still a lot that needs to be done in a big household with in-laws. But this work between home and school keeps me busy and keeps my mind focused. It doesn’t give me enough time to sit around and feel sorry for myself. Also, this effort is nothing compared to the depressing vibe of living with Maa. The Maa without Papa, that is. I am not as strong as Bhaiyya. I don’t know how he tunes out Maa’s rantings and mood swings. Whether she screams in the middle of the night or breaks all the glasses in the kitchen on a whim or decides to hack down all the plants in the garden one day, he seems to just be able to hold it together and not be affected by it. Whether she is diagnosed with depression or intermittent explosive disorder, my brother is stuck with my mother. Even though my mother has gotten better over the years, I don’t think she will ever go back to being the person she was when my father was alive. I already feel bad for my future bhabhi. If I can’t handle my own mother like this, how will she handle a mother-in-law like that? Maybe that is one of the reasons why Bhaiyya isn’t married yet. How can he marry someone and subject them to Maa? In fact, if Ronit knew the real me, he would probably not want to be married to me either. Divorce, no matter how uncommon, is not completely unheard of. But it’s best not to dwell on that today.
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